Ballast that pulls you to the bottom: what prevents you from living
There are so many wonderful, beautiful and amazing things in life that you just can’t stop enjoying such diversity. But not everyone can boast of such an ability to enjoy life, especially in the modern world, where stress and other negative phenomena that most people fixate on. What prevents us from living life to the fullest and experiencing all its taste to the fullest? How to get rid of psychological ballast and finally change for the better?
Contents
Things that prevent you from living life to the fullest
In fact, there are a lot of things that prevent you from living fully, everyone has their own, and it is simply unrealistic to list absolutely everything. However, among everything, we can identify basic problems that constantly hinder the path to happiness, so it is necessary to get rid of them first and foremost. So, a few particularly popular fears and problems:
- Dependence on other people's opinions. A problem, perhaps, that worries every second person, if not the first. Every movement and action is compared not with what results it will lead to and how satisfactory it will be for the person himself, but with the opinion of society. Moreover, the circle of such “appraisers” often extends even beyond relatives, yet people don’t care. Well, first of all, why would you think that anyone would care? Now everyone has their own problems and there is simply no time to pay attention to others, so do you yourself pay a lot of attention to others from this position? Secondly, remember, the consequences that your actions will lead to will have to be dealt with by you yourself, and not by someone else, so make a decision and act according to your principles, and not for “Uncle” Fedya from the neighboring village. Don’t try to live up to other people’s ideals and ideas - you are an individual with your own core, and if someone doesn’t like it, that’s not your problem.
- Parasitic workaholism. Nowadays, in the concept of many, success lies in finances and everything connected with them. This is how people plunge headlong into routine, and when burnout They see the world in gray colors, and often, due to exhaustion, they begin to add new ailments to their medical records. You can’t earn all the money, but ruin your health, miss that happy moment of watching your children grow up, waste your precious time and youth on earning “paper money” - yes. No, no one is saying at all that you need to give up everything and collapse on the sofa as a slacker. You just need to be able to properly distribute your time, which, in addition to work, will include other things that are pleasant to your heart.
- Regular return to the past and constant fear for the future. Another favorite demon of our time, who happily sucks the strength out of his masters. Approach life with your head and common sense, leave your emotions for more appropriate situations. No matter how banal it may sound, the past cannot be changed, and the future is not yet known. The past was given to us so that lessons could be learned from the mistakes made, so as not to “dance” on nothing but rake for an encore. Yes, perhaps a mistake was once made, for which I was deeply offended, but at that time it was not yet clear that it would be a mistake, but when it became one, experience and a lesson were imprinted in my head. Wisdom comes precisely through such, sometimes bitter, experience. Worrying about the future - what is it like? Why? Scared by the unknown? Maybe. But fear and worry can’t change anything, but you can undermine the nervous system. But you can really influence the future if you already, yes, right now, start doing what will lay the brick of your tomorrow. By creating a base, fear will be replaced by confidence.
- Trampling in one place. Einstein once said that insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. This phrase is simply worth its weight in gold. If the same situations regularly happen to you, your day is similar to the previous one, the same nasty personalities meet along the way, the same problems are regularly repeated - maybe you shouldn’t blame fate and the environment for your misfortunes, but just reconsider and really change something? Your life depends only on you and your decisions and on no one else, remember this.
- Act as a piggy bank for negativity and bad emotions. Don’t keep your emotions inside yourself, be sure to let them out, don’t be silent, if you don’t like something, if you want something, speak directly. Many are offended that others do not understand them and do everything the other way around, but in reality these “others” simply may not understand what you want, you have to guess, but sooner or later everything gets boring. By talking about everything directly and frankly, you won’t have to hold a stone in your soul and life will become much easier.
- Fear of telling the truth. The fear of telling the truth, as a rule, comes from the fear of offending someone or exposing oneself as an uncultured person, of being judged for expressing one’s opinion “not like everyone else.” There can be many reasons for lying, but none of them justifies the action itself. Having lied, a feeling of guilt immediately arises in the soul, which may not be caught by consciousness, but will not leave the subconscious. Having lied once, there will be more, over time the lump of guilt will reach such proportions that it will weigh on the soul. Tell the truth, no one has ever condemned you for it, but you are often accused of lying.
- Self-pity. “Oh, what an unhappy person I am... Everyone around me is lucky, but I’m not” - this is where envy, anger at others and at the world as a whole comes from; it seems that fate favors everyone, except for one person, and the further this thought process goes, the harder it is for the person himself. This is pure utopia! Others are lucky only because they acted for their own happiness and benefit, and did not wait for everything to come to them on its own. Someone will say that girls marry rich people, do nothing and have everything. No wow, “they don’t do anything.” To attract the attention of a rich man, you need to try very hard, take care of yourself for days on end, and then, after marriage, watch even harder so that you don’t get in the way of competition. Everyone, absolutely every person who has achieved something and knows how to do something, moved and did it.
These are not all points that should be crossed out and forgotten forever, but they are some of the most striking. Problems of a psychological nature - they probably have no end: excessive criticism of oneself; the desire to please and please everyone; searching for constant excuses and reasons for doing nothing; trying to be perfect; excessive touchiness; the desire to control everything and do it alone; embarrassment; to endure something that doesn’t suit you - all this and a hundred other things, how it ruins your life and puts you in a depressive state. Reconsider your views, your attitude, your thoughts and plans; everyone will definitely have something to adjust. And remember the main thing, if you want to change the world, start with yourself!
How to get rid of complexes
Complexes are another element that interferes with a normal life and spoils the whole mood. As a rule, the complex does not exist in a single copy, but lives in flocks in every person. What is this, complexes? Only by understanding this can you build an effective strategy to squeeze them out. It will seem to many that getting rid of complexes is very difficult and even impossible, since they are so deeply embedded in the subconscious. But in reality there is nothing simpler. Don't believe me? Judge for yourself. Just before this, leave your emotions and look at the situation as if from the outside, with a cold mind.
Complexes are a distorted understanding and invented shortcomings about oneself. Each person comes up with for himself, although it is not clear why, some kind of imaginary ideal, which he simply must comply with. This can relate to appearance, character traits, behavior and anything else. Women often have a complex about breast size; in men, the reason for this is the size of the causative site. Where does this come from? Now, for example, it is “fashionable” to have large breasts, because this is supposedly a guarantee of sympathy from men, but for some reason, actresses and pop stars with very small breasts often become recognized sex symbols. In men, it is believed, the longer the “he”, the better, but for some reason women pay attention to completely different qualities of the stronger sex and manage to fall in love even before they see this powerful, or maybe not so, dignity. The conclusion is that it’s not about size at all, so where do these ideals come from? It's simple - from plastic surgeons, who benefit greatly from such universal paranoia. Until people understand this, crooked noses will continue to be fashionable - straight noses, big eyes - small eyes, flat butts - convex butts, implants will be inserted and removed, and the plastic surgery industry will flourish. And if that’s not the whole point, then why get complex?
The same applies to other shapes and volumes of body parts - there is no ideal and cannot be. Each of us is the way nature created us. It’s simply unrealistic to adapt to everyone’s tastes, because everyone has different tastes and conforming to them is complete absurdity. The human inflamed brain generates some stupid criteria that just need to be thrown out of your head. Just the awareness of such a picture allows you to rethink a lot and learn to accept yourself as real. Any peculiarities of behavior, unique views on life and differences in appearance are the highlight that sets everyone apart from the crowd, makes a person unique and inimitable, how can you be shy about this? Agree, if you had a very beautiful and expensive car/stone or any item in general, and only you had it, in a single copy, would you be proud of your uniqueness? Then why is it wrong with the other? After all, it's the same thing.
Look at the situation differently, separate yourself from stereotyped populism - you are a personality with a capital “P”, be proud of it and don’t even think about being shy.
How to become happy
As they say, everyone has their own happiness. For some it is children, the more of which the better, for some it is money, for others it is world fame. Therefore, the primary happiness can be called the very understanding of what this word means to you. You need to think about this very carefully so that the answer comes from the very depths of your soul, and is not built on the opinion of society. However, if we do not touch upon the material sphere, then the concept of happiness in the modern world, where it is customary to meet some criteria, is probably the opportunity to be yourself and not be afraid of it. The opportunity to go towards your goal, to firmly believe in success, despite pessimistic statements from the outside, to do what you want, despite what they say. Happiness cannot lie in just one thing; it is a complex concept that everyone builds for themselves.
Only you yourself know how to become happy, because only you know what exactly will make you so. There are no step-by-step instructions that guarantee success. Feel yourself, your heart and desires, do not be afraid to move towards your dream, achieve it - this will make you happy.
