How to punish a child
No matter how much we love our children, sometimes their pranks go beyond all limits. And specific offenses cannot be left unpunished. The topic of this article is how to punish a child. How to do it correctly so as not to break the child's psyche and convey an important lesson.
Content
Relationship between parents and children
The relationship between the offspring and the parents is important, any shortcomings and imperfections are immediately visible in the child's behavior. Usually, up to 12-14 years old, these relationships are harmonious and calm. Adults set frameworks and rules, children obey. The relationship between parents is important. After all, looking at them, the baby learns to build his future relationships with the opposite sex. It is very difficult to change the rules laid down from childhood after, during life.
In raising a child, the mother is assigned the role of a moral and cultural ideal, she has an emotional connection with him throughout her life. Father he is also responsible for the discipline, independence of the child. Lack of communication with men can turn into serious problems in the baby in the future. Such as the:
- violation of sexual identity;
- excessive softness and spinelessness;
- lag in intellectual development;
- problems in communication with the opposite sex.
The first rule in communicating with a child is to love him no matter what. Because he is and because he is yours. Confidence in one's own need strongly affects any person, and even more so on a small fragile psyche.
What follows is the common truth - to honor gifts and givers. And this is not really about material goods. You need to respect the information that the little man presents. If he shares, it means that it is important for him. And the baby must learn to correctly accept parental love and care. Do not forget encourage good behavior.
It is imperative to instill hierarchical concepts from childhood. It follows from the previous rule and determines the priority in the give-take system. This flow comes from the parents, as they are higher in the hierarchical ladder. Then it is passed on to older children. The elders take from the parents and give to the younger. Thus, each offspring remembers that it is impossible to get something without giving anything in return.
How to punish a child
Punishment is an important aspect of parenting. But it must be strict enough for the lesson to be learned and careful enough so as not to harm the psyche.
It is worth explaining the mechanism of disobedience. The little man thus clarifies that he is still loved by his parents. As if saying at the same time, “Do you still love me? And even if I do so, do you love me? " Most often, pranks are caused by a simple desire. attract attention... Perhaps bad behavior is the only way to get vivid emotions from your parents.
Plus, the kid is driven by curiosity. He knows that this is not right. But he wants to know what will change in the world if he tries it. Most often, this method is used by children whose parents do not have a strict framework of prohibitions. For example, yesterday it was possible to do this, but today, for unknown reasons, it is impossible.
When punishing a child, use the following rules:
- You can't give in to emotions. All educational procedures must be strictly sober.
- Remember that this is your child, you are responsible for him and love him. Even if you had to use methods of physical pressure, punish with half the strength. After all, the meaning of punishment is not in a sadistic focus on pain, but in the moral aspect of teaching.
- It is not his fault that you have had a difficult day, problems at work, or any other difficulties. You should not take out your irritation on him, be fair.
- Explain in detail why the act is bad and what exactly it is being punished for. Do not allow insults and humiliation to the child. Bummer, slob, fighter - it all sounds like an urge to do just that.
- Each punishment should have a clear time frame. Agree, if you forbade eating sweets for the rest of your life, and then you yourself forgot and treated the baby to candy - the authority of the parent will fall in the eyes of the baby.
- Be sure to establish a ritual of reconciliation. Ask if the child understood what he was punished for and why it is no longer worth doing. Then hug him, kiss him. Or use the make-up ritual. These actions will syvolize the end of the punishment.
How to punish a child a year
Our brain is designed in such a way that only closer to 3 years old we begin to identify ourselves as "I". That is, before the child simply does not understand that misconduct leads to punishment. Which his personality will receive. Therefore, it just doesn't make sense to punish a 2-year-old baby. With behavior that goes against parental prohibitions, you just need to switch his attention to something else.
From about 4 years old, the child begins to act by example. That is, he did not consciously commit such a bad deed, he simply repeated it after someone else. Not necessarily a family member or other person on the street. He may have seen this action on TV.
The problem of education
When raising a young personality, remember that everything is good in moderation. Excessive severity will cause the kid to become a rebel, or vice versa, a complete bummer. Most likely there will be developmental deviations. Permissiveness threatens to turn the child into spoiled. Will not reckon with other people's opinion. Or, having tried everything he wants, he will quickly lose interest in life and start looking for it, for example, in drugs.
Do not allow yourself to attempt total control of the child. He should have the right to privacy. It is better to establish strong friendships so that the child himself wants to tell everything. Otherwise, this will result in complete alienation of the baby from the parents.
