Top 5 popular fears: how to stop being afraid... and start living
There are a lot of interesting things in life: new acquaintances, extreme sports, opportunities for advancement at work. We just need to take a step forward or extend our hand, but fear stops us. We are afraid of strangers, the dark, heights and generally everything unknown. In order not to miss opportunities, you need to learn to get rid of the fear of new things and emotions.
Contents
How to stop being afraid of people
The reason for fear of communicating with people is that you do not know what to expect from them. You are afraid of seeming stupid or funny, of being misunderstood or ridiculed. The fear of communication makes life very difficult, because every day we have to meet many people, at work or school, in the store and on public transport.
Psychologists suggest performing simple exercises that will help overcome the fear of communication:
- On your way home on public transport, you ask the conductor a question about the route. You are seeing this person for the first time, the question will not seem strange to him. You can find out more about transfers and intersections with other routes. A short conversation will begin, and a positive experience of communicating with a stranger will appear.
- Telephone communication training. Find the phone number of any organization, for example, window installation or household appliance repair. Call and find out the conditions, opening hours, prices and discounts. If you can’t start a conversation, then hang up, no one will see you or judge you. The experience of telephone communication is gradually accumulated.
- Once you feel more confident, visit a hardware store. Choose a product that you do not plan to purchase, get all the information about it from a consultant. As a result, you will learn to obtain the necessary information and also refuse to purchase. Many people are embarrassed to bother sellers if they do not plan to make a purchase.
- Learn not to be embarrassed by your own needs. Come to the pharmacy and buy condoms, lubricant or other “immodest” goods, first ask about the different models. Think about sex as a natural need of the body. As a result, you will learn to ask any questions to strangers.
- Come up with a question on a topic that interests you and conduct a survey of people on the street. At first it is difficult to approach strangers and pester them with conversation, but over time your confidence will increase. The fear of communication will go away.
You can use other techniques to chat with strangers. After a month of active practice, your fear will pass.
How to stop being afraid of the dark
Who among us was not afraid of the dark as a child? Horror stories heard among friends, incomprehensible rustles and creaks aroused fear of seeing a monster. With age, for most people, such fears go away. But they continue to pursue someone. So what exactly are we afraid of:
- We cannot see in the dark, so we cannot make sure that there is no danger nearby.
- Evil heroes that frightened us as children, or invented villains from films.
- Criminals from our real world, information about which we find in the media.
To stop being afraid of the dark in your own home, you need to convince yourself that the noise is coming from household appliances, and the curtains are swaying from a draft. The windows and doors are closed and nothing threatens you, there are familiar household things around.
Next, think about how real witches, koshchei and other evil spirits are. Even if you accept the existence of the other world, its inhabitants are unlikely to come to visit you.
If you are particularly impressionable, then avoid crime news and films. Don't listen to gossip about what's happening in your city, don't read the incident column in the local newspaper.
To increase the security of your home, install bars on your windows and install a second door with an electronic lock.
Get a large dog, it will greet all uninvited guests. Take a self-defense course or get a gun permit.
How to stop being afraid of flying
Climbing up the stairs of an airplane, almost everyone experiences a slight fear of flying, because we leave the stable ground and rise to a height of thousands of meters. Aerophobia in its pure form is rare; more often it is combined with a fear of heights or the inability to control what is happening.
Some experience minor bouts of fear that do not prevent them from traveling or flying on international business trips. Others completely abandon air transport, depriving themselves of many opportunities.
If your attacks of fear are strong and prolonged, and you cannot cope with them, then you need to consult a psychologist. There are special group classes for aerophobes, where pilots and stewards are invited. The work of these people involves flying, they teach how to cope with panic. 
It is important to know that drinking alcohol to improve your well-being on board is not recommended. During the flight, the effect of alcoholic drinks increases, intoxication comes quickly, and can cause a loss of strength or a quick hangover. Before a flight, it is not recommended to study the crash statistics of the aircraft models on which the flight is planned. Airplane is the safest travel option today. Thousands of flights are carried out every day, and disasters, fortunately, occur 1-2 times a year.
To overcome your fear, read the information about the safety certification of Russian airlines. All aircraft are regularly checked, their cost is very high, so the company does not benefit from accidental breakdowns.
The safety margin of aviation equipment is more than 25 years; almost the entire fleet of Russian aircraft has been in operation for less than 15-20 years.
To calm down, on board, take a break from what is happening outside the window, read a book, listen to music. Sweets or chocolate will help improve your mood. And if panic increases, then take a calming pill and take a few deep breaths. Think about the place where you are flying, plan your free time and mentally make a list of gifts for your family. Time on the road will fly by.
How to stop being afraid of heights
Fear of heights occurs as a result of negative experiences in childhood. You have either fallen from a great height yourself or seen similar incidents. Experienced negative emotions provoke a fear of heights.
One should distinguish between the normal instinct of self-preservation, when a person is scared on the roof of a high-rise building, and a panicky fear of even the smallest height.
If a person has a phobia, they panic, their breathing and heart rate increase. You cannot get rid of your fear of heights quickly; you need to gradually get used to heights.
- Start working on yourself by recognizing the problem. Understand that you can fall even out of the blue, and trembling knees do not provide stability.
- Start climbing to heights, starting from the level at which a mild phobia appears. Spend some time there, reassuring yourself that you are safe. Next time you climb to greater heights, keep a journal of your achievements.
- The psychological technique of visualization helps to overcome phobia in fantasy, then in reality. First you need to close your eyes and imagine yourself on a mountain, but you are not afraid of falling. After daily practice, the fear will go away.
If you feel an uncontrollable attack of fear, try to relax, breathe deeply and evenly.
How to stop being afraid of men
Fear of men has 2 sides: the victim complex and fear of being rejected. Methods for getting rid of fear vary:
- Most women are afraid that a man will leave them.
Sometimes it comes down to paranoia. The reason for fear often lies in the family, when the daughter feels that her parents do not love her enough. Psychological work on oneself helps to get rid of fear: a woman does not die or become physically ill if she breaks up with a man. Awareness helps you understand that even breaking up with a man can be survived. The main thing is to remain interesting to yourself, in this case the new relationship will be more successful. Love your body and take care of it for yourself, not for men. Analyze your behavior with men, possible mistakes, in order to avoid them in the future. - Victim women are almost always in relationships, but do not experience joy from them. The man oppresses them, suppresses them emotionally, controls their lives.
The emergence of a victim complex is often associated with past violence. It is very difficult to get rid of the complex. First you need to try to regain control over your life and finances. Allow yourself to disagree with a man on everything. He will feel resistance and reduce the pressure.
Love yourself and change your worldview. Enjoy every day and expand your circle of friends.
How to stop being afraid to live
Write a list of things that really scare you. Work with each point. Everyone has fears, many protect you from negativity. You need to use such fears wisely and learn to control them.
Fears that prevent you from living life to the fullest need to be healed.
Work on your emotional balance, attend trainings and courses. Try doing what you are afraid of several times. Get behind the wheel of a car or jump with a parachute. Over time, you will forget about your fears and begin to enjoy life.
