The dangers of low self-esteem

How well do people live? normal self-esteem- they always succeed, they do not suffer from complexes and never doubt their decisions. But healthy self-esteem is not a gift from nature, but the fruits of the labors of both parents and the individual himself. If you want to become a confident person and have good self-esteem, then this is the place for you!

Signs of low self-esteem

You can understand that you clearly have low self-esteem by the following signs:

• You find it difficult to say “no” to people. More precisely, it’s not difficult, but you can’t do it at all. Even if you don’t really want to do something that someone else asks, you still answer “yes” and do it against your will. Such fear speaks of the desire to be “good” for everyone at once, to be liked by everyone, and even if this goes against your own interests and desires, it’s easier for you to step on your own throat. A good way out in this case would be to realize that you need to become a good person first of all for yourself, and not for someone else. Regularly ask yourself what it is that you want! 
• You are constantly jealous of someone. Yes, yes, envy is the lot of those whose self-esteem is low. After all, envy can only be born towards someone who, in a person’s opinion, is luckier and more successful than him in something; a belittlement of one’s own merits automatically occurs. Next comes dissatisfaction with yourself because you did not have time or were unable to achieve something. To overcome this quality, you need to unlearn how to compare yourself with outsiders and learn to measure your achievements only in relation to yourself, but, for example, a year or two earlier - this is the only true measure.
• You are afraid to talk about your desires. This fear is very close in nature to the first sign, when it is difficult and impossible to say “no” to others. Fear of standing out from the crowd and declaring that you want something of your own. Sort of like a herd method. The only way to defeat him is to understand that you are a person who, like others, has the right to his desires, and then learn to talk about them.
• There is a constant desire in your head to lose weight. And not only lose weight, but also change something in your appearance - enlarge your breasts/lips/butt, change eye color, etc. This suggests that you do not consider yourself harmonious, do not recognize your external data as satisfactory, but consider something or someone more beautiful. Accept yourself for who you are and don’t try to go towards imaginary perfection, it still doesn’t exist. This, of course, does not mean that you need to disregard your body, because a slim body in which there is no excess fat deposits is, first of all, not even beauty, but health. 
• It is difficult for you to make decisions on your own, so you constantly ask outside people for advice. Constantly asking for advice is not good, especially if the advisors include complete strangers who are in no way interested in making you feel good. Just imagine, you trust your life to a complete stranger, who bears absolutely no responsibility for how your action turns out, and you will have to accept all the consequences and be responsible too.

These are not all the signs of low self-esteem; in fact, there are many more. But these are the ones that stand out clearly and catch the eye. It is not typical for an individual with low self-esteem to take risks, of course, we are not talking about a stupid risk, but, for example, he will not open a business, because he is not confident in himself and that his idea will be useful to someone. Such people constantly feel guilty, even if in fact they have nothing to do with the situation, they will still find a reason to blame themselves. Already from such a small list, a person with low self-esteem will clearly identify himself.

The dangers of low self-esteem

Almost no one attaches importance to the fact that low self-esteem can be dangerous, but it really is. Let's start with the fact that every person, especially those with problematic self-esteem, wants to realize themselves and achieve success. But due to lack of self-confidence, he cannot do this. This gives rise to a lot of psychological problems. Due to the fact that he cannot express his opinion, declare his desires, and even more so say what he really thinks, outbursts of anger regularly occur in his soul, which remain inside and do not find a way out. All this together creates a very negative foundation for physical and psychological health.

On the mental plane, such an individual develops a chronic stress and depression, and they are known to have serious consequences and can even lead to suicide. On the physical plane, first of all, the heart and circulatory system suffer, as well as the organs of the digestive tract, ulcers develop and constant heartburn torments, the liver gives way and the entire immune system weakens. Of course, the clinical picture develops gradually and does not appear after a month or a year. But there is no doubt that over time health problems will appear.

Insecure people select life partners who often lead an immoral lifestyle, or who feel superior and take advantage of it. Moreover, the worst thing is that an insecure person holds on to such a “beloved” with his hands and feet, believing that he does not deserve better. This explains the fact that women live with tyrants, alcoholics and drug addicts, endure their beatings and do not report them where they should.

An insecure person is doomed to envy others and secretly hate them while watching them achieve success. Their whole life is played out according to someone else’s script, and by the end of their life, severe and prolonged depression sets in.

But what’s even worse is that such a person ruins the life not only of himself, but also of his children. The fact is that problematic self-esteem is inherited by children and all this is quite understandable. It is so inherent in nature that from birth a child adopts the behavior style of his parents, he thinks like them, because up to a certain point he is simply not able to learn information from other sources. And when that moment comes - it’s too late - the worldview has already taken root and it will be very difficult to change it.

The danger of low self-esteem is difficult to overestimate, and the consequences could be listed for a very long time. But even these facts are already enough to start working on your inner qualities and develop a healthy attitude towards yourself.

How to increase self-esteem

Get ready for the fact that increasing self-esteem is not a quick process and certainly not an easy one. Don't expect results in a month or in a day or a week. Although, in general, it all depends on your efforts and how much you want to change your attitude towards life and yourself.

Today, a huge number of different exercises have been compiled, countless amounts of literature have been written, millions of trainings have been organized on the topic of increasing self-esteem, that it is not even clear where else these problems could come from. Do they really not work and is it all a fiction? Or maybe low self-esteem is a chronic disease that cannot be treated? Not at all, you can be cured, but only under the main condition - a strong desire to do it! If it is not there, then no one and nothing will help you. Therefore, everything depends on you and only you.

And these tips will help you start moving in the right direction towards a life where you believe in yourself:

• The first thing you need to do is reconsider your social circle. Who is around you? People who are dissatisfied with life, constantly whining and whining about the injustice of life? Those who see life only in gray? But it is very contagious, just like vice versa. To become a different person, you need to communicate with those who already are. Try to be in the company of positive people, be where confident people communicate, maintain useful contacts. This will undoubtedly get you on the right wave, and say goodbye to those who are dragging you down with their attitude towards life forever and without regret.
• Don't evaluate yourself, evaluate the results. When you have done something and it has led to something, evaluate the fruits of your labors, and not yourself. Evaluate how well everything worked out or maybe something should have been done differently. This way you will avoid “self-eating” and will not reproach yourself. In general, try to look at the situation from a third-person perspective.
• If someone praises you, under no circumstances remain silent and do not say “You’re welcome” or an embarrassed “Oh, okay.” Once you thanked, praised or made a compliment, it means there is something for it. Therefore, the correct response to this is “thank you” and “please.”
• Get up in front of the mirror every morning and conduct sessions with the pronunciation of affirmations. You can compile them yourself or find a large list on the Internet. Just never use the particle “not”, otherwise the affirmation will give the opposite effect to the desired one, since the subconscious does not perceive “not”. For example:
  • “I’m not scary” is wrong; “I’m beautiful” is correct.
  • “I’m not fat” is wrong; “I’m slim” is correct.
  • “I’m not a failure” is wrong; “I am successful and lucky” - correct, etc.
• Take action, don’t think for a long time, and after you’ve thought through everything, just do it and don’t even think about whether the idea will work out or not. Remember, only those who do nothing make no mistakes!
• In the near future, plan to read books on the topic of increasing self-esteem. Books, not articles. Such literature gives a detailed assessment of things and situations, they are written by professionals in their field, they give practical advice and describe exercises that can really help.

And finally, it is worth saying that a good psychologist will be the main assistant in this matter, especially if the situation is critical. A good one, with extensive experience, a wealth of knowledge, appropriate qualifications and a large number of satisfied clients. You will have to look for this, but otherwise there will be no point in contacting. Yes, the services of a specialist are not cheap, but you cannot skimp on the quality of your life, otherwise you risk missing out on the most pleasant and happiest moments of your life, and also not knowing what success and self-realization are. The choice is yours!