Loneliness and its causes

Even in the largest crowd, you can feel lonely. This feeling makes it difficult to live fully, to enjoy every day, to meet new achievements. If there are no friends, a loved one nearby, then in difficult times there will be no one to support and comfort you, to give you valuable advice. However, not all lonely people are unhappy, for many it is a conscious choice to develop in solitude. But there are few such individuals, the majority still suffer in the absence of family and friends. There is a feeling that something is missing all the time. How to cope with this feeling and learn how to use its positive side will be discussed in the article.

The reasons for loneliness

Various factors can cause feelings of loneliness, but the main ones are:

• Low self-esteem and inner dislike. A woman who does not love herself, as a rule, does not arouse interest in others. Self-esteem is affected complexes due to flaws in figure and appearance, past failures in relationships with the opposite sex, childhood psychological trauma.
• Deceived false expectations. The ideal of a man formed in his youth makes it difficult to objectively evaluate real partners. In addition, the risk of not meeting a man who meets all the criteria increases and being left alone without a family.
• Negative interpersonal experiences make you want to be alone. This applies to love and friendship, when, due to separation or betrayal, people stop trying to get closer to others.
• Unpleasant facial expressions, harsh gestures, haughty tone of communication. Inner stiffness, lack of self-confidence sometimes leads to the fact that facial expressions become repulsive. The timbre of the voice, gestures affect the desire of others to talk to you.
• Unkempt appearance, dirty nails, greasy hair negatively affect the impression you make on those around you. Men are unlikely to want to make an appointment with an unkempt lady.
• Fear of relationships. In society, it is customary to live in pairs, but it happens that a person is internally not yet ready to reveal his soul to another.
• Belief in a higher power that decides fate, and one's own lack of initiative. In order to find communication or a partner, you need to at least go outside, go online.

There are many more individual reasons for loneliness, and realizing them is the first step to a fulfilling life.

How to live alone

If you dislike yourself, then self-esteem must be increased. To do this, write your merits on a sheet of paper, fix the sheet in the most prominent place. Remember that there are no perfect people, everyone has flaws. Use your strengths to love yourself. When inner harmony is achieved, people will be drawn to you.

Learn to realistically evaluate the people around us, don't follow stereotypes or first impressions. Even if you have loved blondes all your life, a dark-skinned brunette can become your real soul mate. And if the relationship does not work out, do not despair, there is still a lot of good ahead.

By creating an artificial image, you risk being left alone, because you will attract completely inappropriate men. While masking your fictional flaws, remember to be yourself. Hair and makeup must accentuate and decorate your inner self.

Keep track of your wardrobe. Clothes may not be trendy, but should highlight your dignity, have a pleasant color, be clean and ironed. Go to the hairdresser regularly, get a manicure. You need to smile more often and try to see the positive in the world around you. This will certainly transform your look, facial expressions and gestures.

The longing from loneliness aches in my soul

Each of us is alone in his own way. We are born and we go alone. Maybe friends are only extras, and is it really necessary? After all, it has been proven more than once that friends rarely stay close in sorrows.

Each of us has a natural need for communication, but this does not mean that you can be a friend. Conversation with unfamiliar people at a convenient time can be easy and enjoyable, arises when you want it. But not everyone can and will want to have a friend, and to be with him at the right moment.

With the advent of a family, worries become more, and the circle of contacts is narrowed. There is not enough strength and time to maintain friendly relations. You get tired of family and friends too. Therefore, the concept of loneliness is no longer associated with something bad, but is perceived as an opportunity for relaxation, self-development and receiving new emotions. In addition, communication is currently taking place over the Internet, without direct contact. An interlocutor by interests can be found on thematic forums, chats at any time.

Natural features, character warehouse also affect a person's attitude to loneliness. If by nature you are an introvert who enjoys communicating with yourself, within the walls of your home, then you will not suffer from the absence of noisy companies. Living alone is quite comfortable for introverts. In addition, there are very few real friends. Not everyone is lucky enough to have them, and friends and acquaintances do not want to delve into other people's problems, help, empathize. So maybe you shouldn't suffer from the absence of such people in your life? Use all your energy to get the most out of life, travel, discover new places.

How to get rid of loneliness

There are a number of helpful tips to help you avoid worrying about your loneliness:

1. To avoid feeling lonely and unhappy, do not sit at home. Find something to do, because a busy person cannot be unhappy. If you do not have free time, then reflections on the topic of loneliness simply will not arise. Resume your old hobby or learn something new. An interesting side job will not let you get bored, and free money can be spent on luxury goods.
2. Eat your favorite foods with good music. In these minutes, the body will release endorphin hormones, you will feel a surge of positive emotions.
3. Change your hair, makeup, or buy a new thing. Often the cause of loneliness is complexes about appearance. Emphasize your merits, straighten your shoulders, smile, and people will be more willing to communicate with you.
4. If you are afraid to meet in real life, then look for friends over the Internet. In the first minutes of communication, no one sees you, you can think about your statements... After the virtual communication is pleasant and not embarrassing, move on to meetings in the real world.
5. Go to a crowded place. At a party, concert, cinema or museum very easy to start a conversation, and maybe you will make new friends.
6. Do not refuse help if you can do something for another person. Good deeds return, a grateful acquaintance can become a faithful friend or loving spouse.
7. Don't be alone if you feel bored. Dial to parents, classmate, light conversation on general topics will help suppress the growing melancholy. At home, turn on bright lights and fun loud music.

Exercise is a good way to get positive. In addition to the fact that there will always be active like-minded people nearby, you will improve your health.

Loneliness: advice from a psychologist

Don't dwell on the problem. Many people deliberately choose to be alone, taking pleasure in being one with oneself. Periods of loneliness happen in every person's life. For some, they sometimes become despondent and melancholy, others use them for relaxation, raising the level of education, expanding their horizons. What it will be with you is up to you.

Do not think that married people do not feel lonely. Many married ladies remain misunderstood and unheard, live in pairs only for the sake of social status. Whether it is worth remaining unfree and unhappy, or living peacefully alone, everyone chooses differently. The main thing is not to be idle, but to move, develop, enjoy every day spent in the company with you.