How to learn to understand people

Understanding is the main key to success in human relationships. If a marriage breaks up, conflicts occur at work, communication with friends or relatives stops, we usually say that understanding has disappeared. This means that for some reason two people have moved away from each other or hostility has arisen between them. How to avoid this and learn to understand loved ones?

What does it mean to understand a person

Understanding- the most important category in the relationship between people, cultures and even entire countries. In philosophy, this concept is interpreted as the ability to express and perceive information, messages, and general information about the subject, about the surrounding and inner world can be included here. Therefore, if you really want to understand loved ones, first of all, learn how to correctly express, perceive and interpret information.

Any success, whether at home or at work, is based on establishing contact between two personalities, and since all people have different characters and temperaments, this is sometimes difficult to do. Of course, at the level of intuition, we feel when it is worth keeping silent or supporting with advice. It is this personality quality that allows you to achieve understanding, that is, to pass through yourself the motives, actions and behavior of another person, to draw the right conclusion and act in the right way. Psychologists have developed several special techniques, having mastered which, you will learn to understand others.

The ability to understand is influenced by many factors, first of all, it is the emotional background, in other words, the mood. To achieve harmony in relationships with both adults and children, you need to treat everyone with kindness and respect, then this will cause reciprocal feelings, because it is understanding that is most appreciated in the family or communicating with colleagues, all parties are interested in establishing connections.

How to understand a loved one

To begin with, let's dispel the illusions of many women about the ideal relationship. Most of the ladies dream of a prince on a white horse, who will rush in and everything will turn out like in a fairy tale. In life, this is extremely rare, it is likely that both the guy and the girl will have a difficult character, bad habits and diametrically opposite points of view on some aspects of life. You are confident that you are doing your best for the relationship, you try your best, but you run into a wall of misunderstanding. Try to look at the situation with different eyes, most likely, your half has a completely different opinion.

Practical tips for gaining understanding:

• Try talking to your loved one about the first time you met, first dates and their details. Perhaps it turns out that he remembers those nuances that you forgot about.
• Analyze different situations together more often, find out his opinion and note exactly where you differ. There is nothing wrong with that, you are a couple, but still completely different people and take for granted the differences in the perception of the world.
• When you show concern for your man, often ask yourself why you are doing this. Perhaps, having advised not to communicate with one of your friends, you are not worried about him, but yourself. Try to accept the right of your loved one to your own point of view and personal territory.
• Don't make fun of your spouse's hobbies, even if they seem useless or funny to you. Realizing that your lover's hobby brings him true satisfaction, you will find many advantages in it.
• Constant criticism of a loved one will only lead to a permanent state of the Cold War. In disputes, it is sometimes better to force yourself to close your mouth, not try to convince and impose an opinion. Wait until the man himself makes a decision, if the problem is resolved in a positive way, find the strength to admit that he is right.
• Whatever you do, always ask yourself the question of what these actions are aimed at - to worsen or improve relationships? Then everything will fall into place.
• No matter how offensive it is, watch your speech and do not allow harsh statements and insults towards your opponent. You will achieve your goal and hit the quick, and this greatly undermines the trust in the couple.
• Do not torment your spouse with jealousy and mistrust, because you can be wrong about this, thereby hurting your loved one.
• Do not be too intrusive, remember that you are living with an adult who is able to take responsibility for himself.

How to understand another person

To learn to understand other people, make it a rule not to perceive events and phenomena only through the prism of your own views and beliefs. Sometimes it is very difficult, if you are still able to understand one person, then the other is a complete mystery to you due to differences of opinion.

• When talking with a person, be collected and attentive, pay attention to facial expressions, gestures, manner of expressing yourself and other signals that will help you understand the true motives of his behavior.
• Try to mentally formulate a word or phrase that clearly characterizes the internal state of the interlocutor at the moment.
• If your goal is to win over a person, imperceptibly and unobtrusively copy his postures, gestures and breathing rhythm, the interlocutor will certainly notice this and will speak more openly at a subconscious level.
• Misinterpreting someone's words is the main problem in establishing relations between two people, so do not think it out, but ask the questions that interest you directly.
• Before drawing conclusions about a person, learn from third parties at least something about his life - profession, family, social circle, such information will give a complete picture and explain many things.
• Watch quality films about ideals, morality and mutual assistance, read classics, this will help you understand the nature and psychology of people.
• Communicate as often as possible with those who are in a difficult life situation, visit sick hospices, orphanages, even animal shelters, believe me, you will discover a lot of new things.
• Listen to older people and do not ignore their opinion, life experience allows them to look at a situation or problem from a different perspective.

How to understand that a person is lying

It is quite difficult to immediately understand whether a person is telling the truth or not. He can lie selflessly and quite convincingly, but his gestures, facial expressions and manner of speech will sooner or later give him away. Knowing about some psychological techniques and methods, you can easily expose a liar.

• Take a close look at the interlocutor, eyes can tell about his sincerity. Psychologists believe that if a person looks up in a conversation with you, then he remembers something, that is, he turns to visual memory. But moving your gaze to the right and down indicates an inner monologue and careful choice of words. Body language is very important here, twitching of the shoulder or leg, taking a step back, lifting the chin - all this is also an alarming signal.
• It is possible to expose the deceiver by watching him gestures... A person may be interested in telling something and gesticulating, trying to captivate you, and at the same time shake his head from side to side, as if disagreeing with himself. Other signs of lying are regularly touching the lips, neck and nose, folding the fingers into the lock, stroking one hand with the other (a gesture of complacency).
• Trying to mislead, the interlocutor often moves away from the main topic and talks about all sorts of nonsense, wasting time and wondering whether to tell the truth. Ask him a direct question, most likely, he will be confused and admit to deception.
• To find out the information you need, do not warn the person that there is a conversation. Go beyond the standard scenario, ask the same unexpected questions, periodically change their wording.
• Never lay out everything that you know at once, use leading questions, when there is enough information, you can compare it with the information you know.